For the first time in my life, I went to an interview and did not get the job! That's a tough pill to swallow. Proverbs 13:12 says "Hope deferred makes the heart sick". I have been sick for the last month, physically and emotionally. My spirit has been reaching, grasping after my connection with Father God; sometimes my emotions have been grasping after people...those are days for honest accountability. Some days I have been acutely aware of His presence; others, I have simply had to believe He was there with me. Trust continues to be THEE lesson I am learning.
As a single woman, I have learned to take care of myself. I am resourceful and I know how to get by with little. I'm MacGyver in the kitchen...I'm rather proud of that. But, during the last few months, I have toggled between resourcefulness and full-on self-reliance. God keeps orchestrating circumstances where I can continue in self-reliance or I can ask for help. All my adult life, I have not wanted to ask for help; always being able to find a reason or excuse to take care of it myself. This is a strategically placed lie the enemy wants me to believe so I won't rely on the community God has put around me. Ultimately, it's pride! It's telling God, "I know that you allowed this in my life right now but since I don't trust you to walk me through it, I'm going to fix it myself! I do not believe you, God, have a solution to this situation!"
Self-reliance begets entitlement. Entitlement is pride! Pride is what got Lucifer thrown out of the heavenly realms.
Joseph, though favored by his father, does not exhibit entitlement. When the butler and baker were released from prison, I am sure Joseph had a sense of hope that his time was almost over too. Two years later, his opportunity arrived! After Pharaoh's magicians and wise men could not interpret his troublesome dreams, Joseph was remembered. The seeds he had planted years earlier sprang to life! While hopefully optimistic, Joseph made himself presentable to the King. BUT, he did not demand anything for his services as the interpreter. He saw himself as only the conduit of God's wisdom and peace (Genesis 41:16). He communicated the strategy God revealed to him without a business plan or half the money down! He did not demand compensation for his "skills"! He conveyed the interpretation of the dream, the urgency for immediate action, the specific need for a Governor to oversee, and the detailed plan of action needed to survive the destruction of a seven-year famine. I submit, that's trust and humility! This interpretation meeting turned out to be a job interview with serious life promotion: responsible for EVERYTHING and everyone in the entire land, a signet ring with all the authority that came with it, and a wife (Gen. 41:39-46)!
"Only in matters of the throne will I [Pharaoh] be greater than you are" (Gen 41:40). From imprisoned slave to sovereign authority over everything except the throne! That's the character of Father God! Through His Son, we have complete power over everything except the throne. Here we have an opportunity to put on new lenses through which we can see and experience life as children of the Father! The other half of Proverbs 13:12 says, "but when desire is fulfilled, it is the tree of life." I charge you to take off your old lenses (perceptions, lies you believe, inappropriate expectations you have for others, non-truths about who God actually is, etc) so you can see the tree of life standing right in front of you!
Humility. Trust. Believe.
Welcome to my blog! My intent with this blog is to encourage and challenge. For the past two years, I have been underemployed and frustratingly fulfilled. In my pursuit of answers, God directed me to Joseph’s life. The heart of the matter: to learn to see our circumstances from God’s perspective.
Friday, October 25, 2013
Wednesday, September 18, 2013
An Intentional Slavery?!
What if the Heavenly Father is an intentional God? I think we tend to avoid this subject because we are so uncomfortable with the concept of bad things happening to good people. But life is hard. It's difficult. It just is. Contrary to popular belief, God does not exist to make us all happy so we can live a pain-free, merry life!
When God rescued the Israelites from the hand of Pharaoh and the Egyptians in Exodus, He lead them into the wilderness. The amount of time they spent in the wilderness was their own fault. But He lead them there and he took care of them, feeding them from heaven, providing water when necessary, making sure their sandals did not wear out, etc.
Now, let's switch to Joseph's life. What if his slavery was his wilderness? What if God was training Joseph for something bigger? What if God needed a specific set of circumstances to make the greatest impact, not only on one man's life but an entire nation and region? What if Joseph understood that (not that he knew the end at the beginning...but that he was being launched)? What if there's no record of a complaint from Joseph because he understood that his circumstances were part of a greater plan? What if he knew that if he was faithful in the little he was given (though he was actually given quite a bit since he was as slave), God would multiply?
If Joseph had friends, I wonder what they were saying to him. I have been learning a lot about capacity recently. "Capacity" is defined as the actual or potential ability to perform, yield, or withstand; or the power of receiving impressions, knowledge, etc; mental ability (Dictionary.com). People have capacity. Some people have smaller capacity than others. While this is not about comparison, it is about understanding where people actually are in their journey of growth and maturity. The idea of capacity is why we need boundaries or specifically established lines were one person's responsibility ends and another's begins. So, Joseph's friends would have had to have a large capacity in order to support him all these years. The pessimist side of me says he did not have any friends because, like Job's friends, our friends may not actually understand what God is doing in our lives. Some friends might get parts but most look at circumstances without spiritual eyes.
I submit, in order to go through the wilderness quickly and with maturity, you better surround yourself with people who wear spiritual goggles and will intentionally pour into your spirit, as opposed to suck your spirit dry! I believe that Joseph had people around him who did not live according to the flesh, but by the Spirit! That takes pure intentionality: to discover who God actually is, to define who He made you to be, to live with character no matter what is happening around you, to be faithful in the monotonous...to intentionally respond...intentionally believe God's Word is TRUTH...and, to intentionally stand firm on that TRUTH!
Psalm 3 (AMP):
When God rescued the Israelites from the hand of Pharaoh and the Egyptians in Exodus, He lead them into the wilderness. The amount of time they spent in the wilderness was their own fault. But He lead them there and he took care of them, feeding them from heaven, providing water when necessary, making sure their sandals did not wear out, etc.
Now, let's switch to Joseph's life. What if his slavery was his wilderness? What if God was training Joseph for something bigger? What if God needed a specific set of circumstances to make the greatest impact, not only on one man's life but an entire nation and region? What if Joseph understood that (not that he knew the end at the beginning...but that he was being launched)? What if there's no record of a complaint from Joseph because he understood that his circumstances were part of a greater plan? What if he knew that if he was faithful in the little he was given (though he was actually given quite a bit since he was as slave), God would multiply?
If Joseph had friends, I wonder what they were saying to him. I have been learning a lot about capacity recently. "Capacity" is defined as the actual or potential ability to perform, yield, or withstand; or the power of receiving impressions, knowledge, etc; mental ability (Dictionary.com). People have capacity. Some people have smaller capacity than others. While this is not about comparison, it is about understanding where people actually are in their journey of growth and maturity. The idea of capacity is why we need boundaries or specifically established lines were one person's responsibility ends and another's begins. So, Joseph's friends would have had to have a large capacity in order to support him all these years. The pessimist side of me says he did not have any friends because, like Job's friends, our friends may not actually understand what God is doing in our lives. Some friends might get parts but most look at circumstances without spiritual eyes.
I submit, in order to go through the wilderness quickly and with maturity, you better surround yourself with people who wear spiritual goggles and will intentionally pour into your spirit, as opposed to suck your spirit dry! I believe that Joseph had people around him who did not live according to the flesh, but by the Spirit! That takes pure intentionality: to discover who God actually is, to define who He made you to be, to live with character no matter what is happening around you, to be faithful in the monotonous...to intentionally respond...intentionally believe God's Word is TRUTH...and, to intentionally stand firm on that TRUTH!
Psalm 3 (AMP):
1 Lord, how they are increased who trouble me! Many are they who rise up against me.
2 Many are saying of me, There is no help for him in God. Selah [pause, and calmly think of that]!
3 But You, O Lord, are a shield for me, my glory, and the lifter of my head.
4 With my voice I cry to the Lord, and He hears and answers me out of His holy hill. Selah [pause, and calmly think of that]!
5 I lay down and slept; I wakened again, for the Lord sustains me.
6 I will not be afraid of ten thousands of people who have set themselves against me round about.
7 Arise, O Lord; save me, O my God! For You have struck all my enemies on the cheek; You have broken the teeth of the ungodly.
8 Salvation belongs to the Lord; May Your blessing be upon Your people. Selah [pause, and calmly think of that]!
Deuteronomy 1 (AMP):
29 Then I said to you, Dread not, neither be afraid of them.
30 The Lord your God Who goes before you, He will fight for you just as He did for you in Egypt before your eyes,
31 And
in the wilderness, where you have seen how the Lord your God bore you,
as a man carries his son, in all the way that you went until you came to
this place.
32 Yet in spite of this word you did not believe (trust, rely on, and remain steadfast to) the Lord your God,
33 Who
went in the way before you to search out a place to pitch your tents,
in fire by night, to show you by what way you should go, and in the
cloud by day.
Exodus 14 (NIV):
13 Moses answered the people, “Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again. 14 The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.”
Wednesday, September 4, 2013
TRUST!!!
There’s so much waiting! First, there’s hours searching and
applying for jobs (btw…a completely inefficient process! How many times do I
have to type out my qualifications?!) Then anxiously anticipating that phone
call for an interview; then preparing for the interview, which means getting the
magical outfit picked out and maybe, coloring your hair, painting your nails,
defining the exact accessories (I’m sure accessories never got a counselor a
job…well…I hope not!), etc. Then there’s the aftermath of the well-meaning,
though frustrating question of “have you heard anything?” I wonder how long it
is until they stop asking…because they got tired of waiting with me…or because
they can’t bear to see the pain of my process of … W…A…I…T…I….N….G!!!!
Joseph waited a LONG time! He endured injustices on multiple
occasions. One of which, got him thrown into prison (Genesis 39:11-20). Then,
while there he was given another leadership position (vs. 22-23). This is profound
to me! A prisoner received such
favor that the warden fully entrusted the rest of the prisoners to Joseph’s
care. This pattern of favor in Joseph’s life is another aspect to consider. I
don’t believe Joseph carried resentment in his heart. I believe that would have
separated him from his God and the blessings God was pouring on his captivity.
I do believe Joseph had a seemingly supernatural ability to trust in God’s
defined plan. I could find no record of a complaint. While I’m sure he
struggled with his emotions, he didn’t “beg” until Genesis 40:14-15, when the butler
and baker got released from prison. THEY GOT RELEASED BUT JOSEPH REMAINED AND
WAS FORGOTTEN. Joseph was forgotten even though he sacrificially served the
baker, butler, warden, Potiphar, Potiphar’s wife, Jacob, his brothers, etc.
Joseph was forgotten for two years! He continued to serve and caused his
masters to prosper…waiting for an unknown moment of release. He still honored
God while he was forgotten.
But, the dream interpretations were seeds planted for future
reaping (Genesis 41:12-14). It only LOOKED like Joseph was forgotten. When, in
fact, he was NOT! God was acutely aware of him. He honored God at every turn
and God used him to impact nations.
A couple quotes from Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest:
“Leave everything to Him and it will be gloriously and
graciously uncertain how He will come in—but you can be certain that He will
come. Remain faithful to Him.”
“If you are not living in touch with God, it is easy to blame
Him or pass judgment on Him. You must go through the trial before you have any
right to pronounce a verdict, because by going through the trial you learn to
know God better. God is working in us to reach His highest goals until His
purpose and our purpose become one.”
And from He Shall Glorify Me in The
Complete Works of Oswald Chambers:
“When a man knows his destitution, knows he cannot get hold
of God, cannot be the things he longs to be, he begins to realize what it was
Jesus Christ came to do—to supply what he really lacks. There is no obstacle,
nothing in the past or the present or in his heredity, that can stand in a
man’s way if he will only make room for Jesus Christ.”
**I don't have any questions this time. But I strongly encourage you to journal your response to anything that may have impacted you.
Thursday, August 22, 2013
No Eeyore Here
You know that moment...when you see someone else get what you've been working toward or endlessly desiring, grasping toward hope for, expectantly waiting...THAT thing! Our human response is to judge or criticize or somehow write off that blessing in another's life because we fail to see the other blessings in our own life. When we place our focus on that perceived lack in our own life, we miss the God-designed moments that were intended for our growth and maturity...to deepen our understanding of God and His ways. That is, we look at those circumstances through our human experience instead of trusting and acknowledging him in our own lives (Proverbs 3:5-6).
If one is going to be sold into slavery, I imagine it would be best to be a slave in the house of the officer of Pharaoh! Think about it: Joseph was spontaneously sold to a passing caravan and ended up a slave to the man in charge of protecting the King of the land, the captain and chief of the royal guard, Potiphar (Genesis 39:1). As a slave, he spent significant amounts of time in this man's house and Potiphar actually handed all the duties surrounding the management of his household over to Joseph. "All Potiphar had to concern himself with was eating three meals a day" (Gen. 39:6, MSG). That's some serious trust! Potiphar did not even micromanage the situation. Why would he...I'm sure he was relishing his fortune!
Joseph was a foreigner who became a supervisor, yet remained a slave. While he did not have personal freedom, God blessed everything Joseph touched. God even blessed the household of Potiphar because of Joseph's presence, which Potiphar acknowledged (Gen. 39:3-5)! I submit this acknowledgement contributed to the favor on Joseph's life. Joseph also acknowledged God's hand in his life. He saw how God had orchestrated his position of authority and refused to sin against God and Potiphar when Potiphar's wife persistently lusted after Joseph (Gen. 39:7-10)
There is no way Joseph could be so successful and be walking around complaining and moping about his plight! No way!! Have you ever seen someone who complains consistently? I always think of Eeyore, from Winnie the Pooh, when I see someone walking around with a cloud around them. EVERYTHING that donkey said was sad and negative, even his tone of voice was gloomy; even as a child, I found it irritating and confusing. If I remember correctly, Eeyore was not able to receive Pooh's love for him...though that did not keep Pooh from loving on him! My point: a gloomy person cannot receive love or blessings! Their perspective is tainted to the point that they cannot see truth, joy, and peace!
I don't know if Joseph loved Potiphar, but I know he respected him and his household, including his wife. Since Joseph was so attractive (Gen. 39:6), I am sure he had ample opportunity for some "fun" on the side. But his integrity and honor was firmly established; he knew who he was and what was expected of him. Joseph did not allow slavery to change him nor did his foundation crumble at the consistent difficulty (more on that later). Plainly, Joseph did not allow circumstances to taint him. I believe he really knew, in the core of his being, that God was acutely aware (Psalm 139) of him and had not left him abandoned (John 14:18, Deuteronomy 31:6) in a foreign land.
Questions for further thought:
If one is going to be sold into slavery, I imagine it would be best to be a slave in the house of the officer of Pharaoh! Think about it: Joseph was spontaneously sold to a passing caravan and ended up a slave to the man in charge of protecting the King of the land, the captain and chief of the royal guard, Potiphar (Genesis 39:1). As a slave, he spent significant amounts of time in this man's house and Potiphar actually handed all the duties surrounding the management of his household over to Joseph. "All Potiphar had to concern himself with was eating three meals a day" (Gen. 39:6, MSG). That's some serious trust! Potiphar did not even micromanage the situation. Why would he...I'm sure he was relishing his fortune!
Joseph was a foreigner who became a supervisor, yet remained a slave. While he did not have personal freedom, God blessed everything Joseph touched. God even blessed the household of Potiphar because of Joseph's presence, which Potiphar acknowledged (Gen. 39:3-5)! I submit this acknowledgement contributed to the favor on Joseph's life. Joseph also acknowledged God's hand in his life. He saw how God had orchestrated his position of authority and refused to sin against God and Potiphar when Potiphar's wife persistently lusted after Joseph (Gen. 39:7-10)
There is no way Joseph could be so successful and be walking around complaining and moping about his plight! No way!! Have you ever seen someone who complains consistently? I always think of Eeyore, from Winnie the Pooh, when I see someone walking around with a cloud around them. EVERYTHING that donkey said was sad and negative, even his tone of voice was gloomy; even as a child, I found it irritating and confusing. If I remember correctly, Eeyore was not able to receive Pooh's love for him...though that did not keep Pooh from loving on him! My point: a gloomy person cannot receive love or blessings! Their perspective is tainted to the point that they cannot see truth, joy, and peace!
I don't know if Joseph loved Potiphar, but I know he respected him and his household, including his wife. Since Joseph was so attractive (Gen. 39:6), I am sure he had ample opportunity for some "fun" on the side. But his integrity and honor was firmly established; he knew who he was and what was expected of him. Joseph did not allow slavery to change him nor did his foundation crumble at the consistent difficulty (more on that later). Plainly, Joseph did not allow circumstances to taint him. I believe he really knew, in the core of his being, that God was acutely aware (Psalm 139) of him and had not left him abandoned (John 14:18, Deuteronomy 31:6) in a foreign land.
Questions for further thought:
- How is your perspective clouded so that you see things not as they actually are? What pain in your life is directing your perspective...as a lens skewing your eyesight?
- How are your words? Do you speak failure or life? Do you speak fear or hope? Do you speak abuse or love? Do you speak judgment or grace?
- What blessings have you been missing because of your skewed lenses? Gratitude aligns perspective. List things you're grateful for today...right now and every day!
- What are you jealous of? What is the opposite of that? Isaiah 61: "instead of": Beauty instead of ashes, joy instead of mourning, etc. See if the enemy is trying to distract you from God's design and will. (I.e., If I'm jealous of someone getting a job when I don't have enough money to just live simply, I'm not celebrating their blessing and allowing room for resentment to reside within me...thereby, not trusting God that his plan for me is good and complete (Jeremiah 29:11-13).) The negative side of the "instead of" is a strategically placed lie the enemy wants you to believe so you doubt God. Increase your awareness of strategically placed lies!!
Tuesday, August 13, 2013
A Protective Intervention
What do you think about when you think of Joseph? If you've been around church for more than a minute, you probably remember how his "coat of many colors" got him nearly killed and sold into slavery. Even as a child, I was confused about how his brothers could hate him so much. And, why his father didn't know that his sons would hurt Joseph in such a way. I even subconsciously blamed Jacob for giving Joseph the coat and drawing attention to him!
But as I began my exploration of the details of the story, my perspective began to shift. Bear with me as I unpack this. Remember how Leah was not loved by Jacob? In today's culture, there are lots of "unloved" humans. That is, there are lots of children who's parents do not love them well. Last Sunday, my pastor quoted statistics of 1 out of 3 children are fatherless. That means, 24 million children were likely products of a casual sexual experience that did not come from a place of a committed, loving relationship (I recognize there are exceptions in this number...but our culture is permeated with careless, sexual, so-called relationships, even in the church! No judgment, just reality!) I think that describes Joseph's brothers too! All of Joseph's brothers (except Benjamin) were the result of sex, not intimacy! They were the products of a tricked relationship, which left them vulnerable to displaying the same resentment of their parents' lives. Neither Jacob nor Leah chose to be in a marital relationship; both were forced. I have not found any clues that Jacob ever grew to truly love Leah.
As a counselor, I look for the patterns. One of my tools is to look for generational patterns, such as addiction or abuse. If one generation does not take the time and be intentional to stop such patterns, then the next generation gets an opportunity. Forgiveness, healing, growth and change do not occur without intention. So, Joseph's brothers were just continuing the pattern. Since Jacob did not love Leah, I submit his love for her children was lacking.
I have three nieces. They are loved. Well! They are joyful, vibrant, giggling, sweet little girls. Their parents love each other and have fostered an atmosphere of love in their homes. It does not take research to see that children who grow up in such homes, thrive. Those who grow up questioning their safety, support, and trust, struggle. The problem is rarely the child, it's their environment! That's why I work with adults as a counselor. Parents change...children change, both positively and negatively!
One piece of favor that I found in Joseph's life was Reuben's actions. Reuben stopped resentment from taking it's full course of murder. While it appears that he ultimately failed to protect Joseph by not getting him back to his father's protection, God gave Reuben courage to stand against his brothers, a likely mob mentality. Reuben's actions allowed God to provide another avenue of protection and favor: slavery...to an officer of Pharaoh! To me, it's obvious that Joseph being sold into slavery was God's protection. It would have been only a matter of time before Joseph's brothers would have had another opportunity to kill him and Reuben or Jacob may not have been present to stop it.
Slavery is traumatic. Being seventeen and torn from everything you know, would be traumatic for anyone. Worse, knowing it was your own siblings who sent you away from everything you know, how would you respond?! I would be profoundly hurt and probably resentful. What if God's intervention is traumatic? What if the steps you and I have to take to accomplish the greater picture are painful, traumatic, despairing small steps? (Please note!!! I am in no way promoting abuse here! I'm merely stating that some of the lowest times in our lives are often emotionally traumatic...maybe even spiritually, physically, financially, etc.) I want us to focus on our response to such events. I want to challenge us to trust God anyways, during such events. I want to encourage us to dive, grasp after, desperately seek the Truth of God's character (who he ACTUALLY IS, not who we perceive Him to be)...during such events. This is a daily, moment-by-moment fight.
All the jobs I have applied for over the last year have not turned into an opportunity...yet! Sometimes I got an interview. Most times, I got nothing...no call, no response whatsoever. I was doing everything I knew to do...EVERYTHING! But, I was striving. I was not resting in God's hands. There is a fine line between doing and being, striving and resting. I submit it is a matter of the heart. As a dear friend recently encouraged me, "Do your due diligence" and let God take care of the rest of it. Trust that the circumstances you're in are not outside of God's plan...because, His plan for you is GOOD AND COMPLETE! Stand firm on that! Even if it means..."slavery"!
Questions for further thought:
But as I began my exploration of the details of the story, my perspective began to shift. Bear with me as I unpack this. Remember how Leah was not loved by Jacob? In today's culture, there are lots of "unloved" humans. That is, there are lots of children who's parents do not love them well. Last Sunday, my pastor quoted statistics of 1 out of 3 children are fatherless. That means, 24 million children were likely products of a casual sexual experience that did not come from a place of a committed, loving relationship (I recognize there are exceptions in this number...but our culture is permeated with careless, sexual, so-called relationships, even in the church! No judgment, just reality!) I think that describes Joseph's brothers too! All of Joseph's brothers (except Benjamin) were the result of sex, not intimacy! They were the products of a tricked relationship, which left them vulnerable to displaying the same resentment of their parents' lives. Neither Jacob nor Leah chose to be in a marital relationship; both were forced. I have not found any clues that Jacob ever grew to truly love Leah.
As a counselor, I look for the patterns. One of my tools is to look for generational patterns, such as addiction or abuse. If one generation does not take the time and be intentional to stop such patterns, then the next generation gets an opportunity. Forgiveness, healing, growth and change do not occur without intention. So, Joseph's brothers were just continuing the pattern. Since Jacob did not love Leah, I submit his love for her children was lacking.
I have three nieces. They are loved. Well! They are joyful, vibrant, giggling, sweet little girls. Their parents love each other and have fostered an atmosphere of love in their homes. It does not take research to see that children who grow up in such homes, thrive. Those who grow up questioning their safety, support, and trust, struggle. The problem is rarely the child, it's their environment! That's why I work with adults as a counselor. Parents change...children change, both positively and negatively!
One piece of favor that I found in Joseph's life was Reuben's actions. Reuben stopped resentment from taking it's full course of murder. While it appears that he ultimately failed to protect Joseph by not getting him back to his father's protection, God gave Reuben courage to stand against his brothers, a likely mob mentality. Reuben's actions allowed God to provide another avenue of protection and favor: slavery...to an officer of Pharaoh! To me, it's obvious that Joseph being sold into slavery was God's protection. It would have been only a matter of time before Joseph's brothers would have had another opportunity to kill him and Reuben or Jacob may not have been present to stop it.
Slavery is traumatic. Being seventeen and torn from everything you know, would be traumatic for anyone. Worse, knowing it was your own siblings who sent you away from everything you know, how would you respond?! I would be profoundly hurt and probably resentful. What if God's intervention is traumatic? What if the steps you and I have to take to accomplish the greater picture are painful, traumatic, despairing small steps? (Please note!!! I am in no way promoting abuse here! I'm merely stating that some of the lowest times in our lives are often emotionally traumatic...maybe even spiritually, physically, financially, etc.) I want us to focus on our response to such events. I want to challenge us to trust God anyways, during such events. I want to encourage us to dive, grasp after, desperately seek the Truth of God's character (who he ACTUALLY IS, not who we perceive Him to be)...during such events. This is a daily, moment-by-moment fight.
All the jobs I have applied for over the last year have not turned into an opportunity...yet! Sometimes I got an interview. Most times, I got nothing...no call, no response whatsoever. I was doing everything I knew to do...EVERYTHING! But, I was striving. I was not resting in God's hands. There is a fine line between doing and being, striving and resting. I submit it is a matter of the heart. As a dear friend recently encouraged me, "Do your due diligence" and let God take care of the rest of it. Trust that the circumstances you're in are not outside of God's plan...because, His plan for you is GOOD AND COMPLETE! Stand firm on that! Even if it means..."slavery"!
Questions for further thought:
- If you are a child that has not been loved well, who are the Reubens in your life?
- What events have removed you from traumatic situations, but ultimately protected you?
- Do you strive (Dictionary.com: to exert oneself vigorously) to change your circumstances? What if you put that same energy into striving for the Truth of who God is and trust that He's got in you these circumstances on purpose? What if your perspective shifted from your circumstances to focusing on His face? If you can't see His face, find out why!
Saturday, August 10, 2013
The Beginnings of Joseph
So, what started this whole thing is my expectation that the
life I had before would be the life I have now, except better. After all, I am
more educated and wiser…um, older! I still have favor in people's eyes. I'm not
bragging but I want to express the magnitude of my experience. I have singular
conversations with corporate leaders, pastors, ministry leaders, etc. Almost
all those conversations lead to some sort of opportunity or promise of a future
one.
Yet, for the vast majority of the last twenty months, I have
struggled to keep my four walls secure: housing, utilities, food and
transportation (a very simple life!) My question: how do I have favor with God
and man but still do not have the blessings? Do you see the assumption in that
question?!
One thing about such questions: if you do not ask the right
person, you probably will not get a truthful answer, or worse, you get many
"truthful" answers that leave you wanting and confused. After throwing out the question
to a select few, I boldly asked Father God. He immediately reminded me of the
story of Joseph in Genesis. Of course, I knew the general story but I had this
feeling of expectant anticipation that sent me searching for deeper details and
meaning. You're cordially invited on my journey of discovery.
Joseph was the first-born son of Jacob and Rachel, but
Jacob's eleventh son (twelfth child counting daughter Dinah). He had so much favor that
Joseph's brothers hated him, and refused to talk with him. The Amplified
version of Genesis 37:4 states that his brothers could not even greet him or
speak to him in a peaceful way. That's some resentment! The counselor side of
me thinks of this in the context of family systems and how this may have
impacted Joseph's view of himself. What an experience of extremes! To be so
very loved and so very hated, all within the same family unit.
Before we head forward, it's important to observe the past. Significant parts of this story include the details of
Jacob's pursuit of Rachel, prior to Joseph’s birth. If you remember, Laban
tricked Jacob into marrying both his daughters: Leah and Rachel. Jacob loved
and wanted Rachel (Genesis 29:17-20, 30) but got Leah on the wedding night (Gen
29:23-25). Can you imagine?! That part has always baffled me. What would be
your human response? Jacob had worked a “quick” seven years for Rachel, has sex
with her (or so he thought…weird!) on their wedding night, only to wake up next
to a different woman! I imagine he felt deep anger, probably resentment, maybe
foolishness or shame for not realizing sooner that Leah was not Rachel. (Note:
there some cultural differences here that are beyond my scope of specific knowledge;
be careful not to put your Western experience on a non-western event in
history.) When Jacob went to Laban to complain, Laban manipulated another seven
years of work from Jacob in order to have Rachel as his wife that day (Gen
29:28-30). Jacob surrendered and stayed, because he loved Rachel. He ended up
remaining in Laban's land for a while (someone else can research that…) and he put up with a
lot (Gen 31:6-7)!
Back to Joseph’s life, he was treasured by Jacob because he was the product of the love he had for Rachel...after, Rachel's sister, Leah, gave Jacob nine children (with the help of her maid)! Rachel’s maid gave Jacob two sons. Joseph is the product of years of work, waiting, disappointment, frustration, heartache, etc! Fourteen years of working plus the heartache of watching Rachel go through the emotional turmoil of seeing her sister have many children, plus the stress of moving his family out of Laban's territory and all the abuse he endured, plus...etc. There are considerable stressors in Jacob’s life, to say the least! When Joseph came along, I am certain he was very celebrated…at least on Rachel’s wing of the house.
Back to Joseph’s life, he was treasured by Jacob because he was the product of the love he had for Rachel...after, Rachel's sister, Leah, gave Jacob nine children (with the help of her maid)! Rachel’s maid gave Jacob two sons. Joseph is the product of years of work, waiting, disappointment, frustration, heartache, etc! Fourteen years of working plus the heartache of watching Rachel go through the emotional turmoil of seeing her sister have many children, plus the stress of moving his family out of Laban's territory and all the abuse he endured, plus...etc. There are considerable stressors in Jacob’s life, to say the least! When Joseph came along, I am certain he was very celebrated…at least on Rachel’s wing of the house.
This hit me: it was God’s intention to keep Jacob waiting
for Joseph. He was advocating for Leah, the unloved woman (Gen 29:31). As I
look at my circumstances, I am certain that neither Jacob nor Rachel saw that
God was working out a different situation by using their circumstances. He was
blessing Leah. It was crucial for a man to have offspring, in that culture; you
might say it was his retirement plan.
God let Leah have the favor for a while. I submit God was giving Jacob opportunity
to actually love Leah (Reuben, her firstborn means “see, a son!” Gen 29:32 AMP).
All three of her first sons were an attempt to get love from her husband (look
up the meanings of their names). I’m not sure Jacob ever got the lesson.Will you and I?
Questions for further thought: (I recommend you doing your
own work on applying this to your life, including journaling your thoughts and
insights! Even if you don’t like journaling, try it.)
- That thing you’ve been waiting for, what is God’s greater intent? What might be his greater picture for your time of waiting? I dare you to ask Him...
- If you’re Rachel, what characteristics do you know about God that might lead you to respond in gratitude during your waiting, instead of anger/frustration/disappointment/depression/anxiety?
- The assumption in the question…what do you think it is?
The Background
For the last seven years, I have been seeking, healing,
training, developing, refining...in short, in a magnificently tedious journey. First,
it was discovering who God made me to be, then it was understanding who I am,
then discovery the pain in my life and recovering from the consequences I
experienced as a result of trying to run from the pain; then, it was moving fourteen
hours from home to pursue a graduate degree, where I thought I was going to
learn how to effectively help others...more on that later!
Following graduate school, which nearly killed me, I was unemployed for four months. I was hired by a non-profit organization, where I helped develop their program of integrating clinical counseling with pastoral care. During my time there, I further refined my areas of passion. Yet, I'm still waiting for full employment. Remember “frustratingly fulfilled”? After years of unfulfilled frustration, my spirit is full and I have found my niche! Now to make enough money to survive…then thrive!
Following graduate school, which nearly killed me, I was unemployed for four months. I was hired by a non-profit organization, where I helped develop their program of integrating clinical counseling with pastoral care. During my time there, I further refined my areas of passion. Yet, I'm still waiting for full employment. Remember “frustratingly fulfilled”? After years of unfulfilled frustration, my spirit is full and I have found my niche! Now to make enough money to survive…then thrive!
Please note: While I am not a theologian by training, I intentionally seek to understand my Father God and His ways. While I want to be accurate in my details, I do not want us to get caught up in semantics or deep details that may not have significance to the heart of the matter.
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